


Outside of This Armor

by blondsak



Category: Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Angst, Gen, Hurt No Comfort, Tissue Warning, infinity war fix-it of sorts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-07
Updated: 2018-12-07
Packaged: 2019-09-13 11:20:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,480
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16891623
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/blondsak/pseuds/blondsak
Summary: “So, what do you need from me then? Do I need to sacrifice myself?” Tony asks hysterically, raising his arms. “Fine, take me. I’ll gladly die if it brings him back. I’ll do anything you need me to do, if it means he's alive again.”





	Outside of This Armor

**Author's Note:**

> Title taken from the Brenna Twohy poem “In Which I Do Not Fear Harvey Dent"

NOW

Their ship, a massive destroyer built in Wakanda and carrying 300 warriors, arrives at Titan just shy of the one year anniversary of the Disappearance. As they hover above the planet, not quite within striking distance, Steve can’t help but take in his team one final time. Nat’s there, quietly polishing a dagger. Thor and the lone remaining Guardian are quietly visiting yet again about battle strategies. Across from him Tony is seated between Rhodes and Bruce, both of whom are casting concerned glances at their friend, though neither knows quite what to say. Nebula is at the ship’s controls, as stoic and hyper-focused on defeating Thanos as ever.

It’s Steve who asks the question that’s on all their minds. “Are you ready, Tony?”

Tony doesn’t reply right away, opting instead to stand up in his newly finished and upgraded Iron Man suit. The nanotech forms the Iron Man mask over his face, hiding his expression. Steve has to push down the large wave of grief that hits him then, knowing this is the last time he’ll go to battle side-by-side with his friend.

“I’m ready, Cap. Time to kick some purple ass and avenge my kid.”

 

BEFORE

James is fast asleep in his bedroom at the compound when he wakes to a large crash, followed by a flashing red light and ongoing alert by FRIDAY.

“Attention: possible attack imminent. Take cover. Attention: possible attack imminent. Take cover,” FRIDAY repeats until James shushes her. He’s literally the only soul in the building at that moment, and having lost almost everyone of any consequence to him, he foregoes FRIDAY’s guidance to take cover in favor of padding out to the west-side acreage, where the sounds of the crash had come from, in nothing but his prosthetics and a robe.

“FRIDAY, west-side flood lights,” he calls, and suddenly everything is lit up like it’s Monday Night Football.

About a quarter mile away from the compound proper rests what appears to be a spaceship, buried a good five feet into the earth, fallen on its side. As James takes in the sight, the ship’s main hull door begins to slowly open as though being pushed from the inside.

For a moment, James considers dashing back into the compound, directing FRIDAY to follow Fortress Protocol and preparing for battle. But it’s just him now, and he’s no match, not anymore. He only came back here for Pepper, and now... 

No, best to stand tall and meet the enemy with dignity, not hiding in a giant building full of nothing but outmatched tech and countless ghosts. But then, a figure slowly staggers out from beyond the ship’s door, and James is running before he even fully processes who it is because _it can’t be_. 

Standing before James is a man he held a joint funeral for hardly a week ago. A man he thought he’d never see again. The best man James has ever known.

“Hey, Rhodey,” Tony Stark says with a ghost of a smile as James comes to a halt before him. Behind Tony a woman with blue skin has also come out from the ship, but she barely even glances at James, instead looking at the compound with an inscrutable expression.

“Tones. My god, you’re _alive_ ,” James says disbelievingly, reaching a hand to his friend’s shoulder and giving him a closer look. Tony’s in nothing but a black tracksuit, which is looking worse for the wear with blood and multiple tears. James takes note of the way Tony tenderly holds his side, but doesn’t ask about the obvious injury. In fact, he’d really rather never do any Q&A on everything that’s happened to them both in the past 22 days. But of course, that’s just when Tony looked over James’ shoulder and asked the worst possible question he could. 

“Rhodey, where’s Pep?”

 

NOW 

The ships lands just long enough for everyone to jump out, Thanos’ army is awaiting them. Immediately the two groups clash, and before long the battlefield is awash with the blood of both sides. From his vantage point on the ship Tony can see Thanos on a hill, watching with a grin, the gauntlet covering his arm. He doesn’t even glance up at the ship, and Tony knows then that his hubris will be his downfall.

Nebula points the ship toward the Titan, shooting at him for all she’s worth. None of the beams hit him, instead striking his new children, who one by one fall. Tony opens the front hatch, jumping down into the fray. 

“Stark! Back for more, I see.”

“Just back for you,” Tony says, firing up his repulsor.

Thanos grins. “You drew a drop of blood last time and it almost cost you your life. What will it cost you now?”

“Everything, you piece of shit,” Tony says just as Thor careens out of the ship, Stormbreaker at his side. He aims not for the head but for the knees, and with perfect aim accomplishes his goal as Thanos falls to the ground with a grunt. 

 

BEFORE 

When Rhodey tells him Pepper is dead, it’s like the last drops of what was once an ocean of happiness are drained out of him. He vaguely registers being half-carried into the compound by Rhodey and Nebula, where he is deposited on one of the couches in the main hall and shortly thereafter covered in blankets. 

It wasn’t Thanos, Rhodey explains. Nine days after half the world disappeared, Pepper took a car into New York City for an emergency meeting of what remained of SI’s board. Two hours later she got back into the car, turned the key, and the whole thing blew in an explosion heard blocks away. 

“We suspect HYDRA, or its remnants, but we really don’t know,” Rhodey tells him as he sits in utter misery, shivering from what he distantly recognizes to be shock. “I’m so sorry, Tones. I was still in Wakanda, but when we got the call… god, I’m _so_ sorry.”

Tony doesn’t respond or inquire further; he simply has nothing left to give. For the next few days he wanders about the compound silently. He spends most of his time in his and Pepper’s bed, one arm reached out toward Pep’s side, the other clutching her pillow to his face. 

Rhodey checks on him every few hours, probably to make sure he isn’t drinking himself into oblivion. He doesn’t need to worry, however; Tony remembers how much Pep and Peter (and Happy, gone with the kid) worried about his drinking, and now he can’t even look at his wet bar without tasting ash. 

For the most part Nebula stays out of his way. He overhears her having heated conversations with Rhodey, but he can’t bring himself to care about the rest of the universe when his own small fraction of it has been so thoroughly obliterated.

The times he manages to get out of bed he finds his way to the workshop, where he spends hours staring listlessly at chicken-scratch homework notes, or old pizza boxes, or a pair of worn tennis shoes in the corner, or a few web-shooter designs that sit feet away from an early Iron Spider prototype. He looks around at everything he has left of his kid and wishes he could bring himself to burn it all down, to just add it all to the many piles of ash his life has become. But he can’t - it’s all he has left.

The object of his attention currently is a photo he has taped above his main desk that FRIDAY had captured. It was taken about four months before Thanos, in the very lab Tony sits in now. He’d just finished giving the kid praise (for what precisely, Tony has long since forgotten - for all he teased him, there was never a shortage of things to praise Peter for), and the kid had positively beamed with pride as Tony looked on with affection. FRIDAY had taken the still frame and sent it to Tony’s personal Peter Parker File. Of all his photos of Peter and him, that one was his favorite. He’d printed it out and taped it up, taking silent delight in the deep blush and soft smile that came across the kid’s face when it caught Peter’s eye the next time he visited the lab.

“FRIDAY, get May Parker on the phone,” Tony says, pulling the photo down into his hands. He’ll never be ready, but she deserves to hear the entire truth of Peter’s last hours. To hear how Tony failed his kid. To berate him for breaking his promise to her to never let Peter come to lasting harm.

“I’m sorry, boss, but I cannot contact May Parker. I regret to inform you that she is listed among The Disappeared.”

Tony drops his head into his hands, the photograph dropping to the tiled floor. 

 

NOW

“Is that all you got?”, Thanos cries out, laughing.

“Not even close, asshole” Tony says, firing his repulsor at Thanos’ head. Instead of being struck down, however, the beam stays in place, encompassing the Titan’s skull. He begins to softly pant and grunt, then claws at his head to no avail.

“I’ll admit BARF wasn't the best name, but you’d be surprised what it’s capable of when combined with the tech prowess of Queen Regent Shuri and my knack for creating weapons of war. How does it feel to see the murder of your daughter over and over?”

Thanos doesn’t reply, still trapped deep in his very worst memory, watching Gamora beg for her life again and again.

By now the ship has landed, and from behind Tony, Nebula emerges with a vibranium spear, specially made in Wakanda for just this moment.

“He’s all yours,” Tony says. 

For all of Tony’s rage, Nebula may carry even more, and she doesn’t hesitate to point the spear at the Titan.

“For my sister,” she cries, plunging the spear straight through Thanos’ neck.

 

BEFORE

Steve arrives at the compound nearly a week after Tony’s had crashed-landed, along with Nat, Thor and Bruce. Rhodey had informed them of the man’s miraculous return the night it happened; at first the colonel was hesitant to have them come to the compound, but something - or more specifically _someone_ \- had changed his mind.

“Look, Rogers, a woman came back with Tony. A woman with _blue skin_ ,” Rhodes had told him over the phone. “I don’t want to say much more on this line, but she is insistent we all meet. However, she refuses to leave Tony, and Tones refuses to leave the compound. She says he’s the key to bringing everyone back, but won’t say more.”

“To tell you the truth, Colonel, I’m afraid we’ve been more of a burden to Wakanda than anything since the battle. We’ll head out in the morning for the compound,” Steve answered, taking a breath. “How is Tony, honestly?”

“Honestly? I’ve never seen him worse,” Rhodes replied. “He barely sleeps, doesn’t hardly eat, refuses to talk to me… he’s walking around here like a zombie. I certainly can’t blame him, with everyone he’s lost. But I don’t know if he’s up for trying to fix this, even if he wanted to be.”

Steve’s brow furrowed; besides Pepper and maybe Happy, he didn’t know who else Tony could have possibly lost that he’d been close to. He wisely chooses not to comment on this - he’ll get answers in New York one way or another. “Okay, well, let’s see how things are when we arrive.”

Sixteen hours later, Rhodes greets them at the door of the compound, the aforementioned blue-skinned woman at his side.

“My name is Nebula,” she announces to the group. “I was with Stark on Titan, and brought him to Terra following the lost battle with Thanos.”

“Colonel Rhodes said you specifically asked to meet with us,” Natasha replied. “Is there something you know that can help us now?”

Nebula raised her chin, squaring herself. “I am a child of Thanos, and I believe I know where he may be.”

 

NOW 

Steve arrives from the battle just in time to watch the Titan take his final gasping breath, Nat and the Hulk at his side. Both he and Tony reach the massive corpse just in time to see Nebula spit on it, and Steve feels the man’s eyes on him as he pulls the gauntlet off the Titan, but he can’t bring himself to meet his gaze.

Tony looks away from him and turns to the others, now all forming a half-circle around him. One by one they nod at him, though Rhodey adds “Be strong, my brother,” when he comes upon him. Tony gives him one final nod, then turns to Steve.

“Okay, Cap?”

Steve knows what he’s asking, and this time he has no trouble meeting his gaze. He hands the gauntlet over. “Okay, Tony.”

Tony puts it on - _take me to him_ \- and his world fades away to white light.

 

BEFORE

When Rhodey had FRIDAY inform Tony of the remaining Avengers’ arrival, he stalls for hours before emerging from the workshop. It wasn’t that he was afraid of seeing Cap again, or the others. He just didn’t see the point. Thanos had already accomplished the carnage he’d set out to do. It was done, and only damage control was a viable option now. 

But, even he realizes in his grief-addled mind that he couldn’t hide forever. A short walk and elevator ride finds him in the living room of his personal suite, where it seems everyone has congregated to wait for him. As he walks up to them, he can’t help but take in their stricken expressions. 

“I must really look like shit, huh,” he says in way of greeting, passing by them all without falter. “If you need me, I’ll be in bed, mourning the death of the only woman I’ve ever truly loved. Do whatever the hell you want, as long as you leave me alone.”

“Tony, wait,” Steve starts, but is cut off when Tony whips around, face turning red.

“I don’t want to hear anything from you, Rogers,” he snaps, “not after you left me for dead in Siberia. What are you even doing back? You gave me that damn phone so I could call you if I needed you. Well, I didn’t need you then, I don’t need you now, and I _certainly_ didn’t invite you here. So just get the hell out.”

Silence greets his outburst. Bruce, Thor and Rhodey are staring cigarette burns into the floor. Tony can feel Steve floundering for a response; even Nat, who is usually up for a verbal spar, seems at a loss. 

Tony takes a deep breath and sighs. He’s too exhausted and too broken to stay angry about shit that went down two years ago, not when it seems so petty in comparison to the present day's horrors. “Look, I don’t know what you want from me, but I’ll save you all the trouble. I’m no hero, I have no idea how to fix this, and I’m done with Iron Man… I’m fuckin’ done with all of it.” He pauses, only to follow it with a humorless chuckle. “Despite my best efforts at obtaining an untimely death, it seems fate wants me to die an old, lonely man.”

He turns to shuffle off toward his bedroom once more, when Nebula stands up. “You’re not done, Stark, and you do not get to walk away from this. You and I both heard what the terran wizard said on Titan. He gave Thanos the Time Stone in exchange for your life. You don’t get a choice. You are part of this whether you want to be or not.”

Before Tony can respond, a portal opens in the middle of room, and through it steps an Asian man in robes. Though it’s been weeks and they only met briefly, Tony instantly remembers him. “Wong.”

“Hello, Stark,” Wong says, and nodding toward Bruce, “Banner.”

Bruce nods in reply, eyebrows raised. Steve, Nat and Rhodey all have dropped jaws, while Thor merely bows appreciatively. “An entrance reminiscent of Asgard, my new friend.”

Wong turns to Tony. “This child of Thanos is correct, Stark. You are part of this. In fact, you are the key.”

 

NOW

Tony opens his eyes. He’s standing at the edge of a large lake, the sky above cloudless and tinted a deep bright orange. The sudden change from the cacophony of battle to utter silence has his entire body shaking with nervous energy.

“M-Mister Stark?”

Tony turns, and there - _right there_ \- is Peter. His suit is torn ten ways from Sunday, his mask is nowhere to be seen, he has a dried bloody nose, and he couldn't look more perfect to Tony if he tried. 

Tony opens his mouth but chokes on his words as Peter barrels into him, wrapping his arms around the man, slotting his head into the crook of Tony’s neck just as he has dozens of times before.

“You’re here! You made it! I _knew_ you would do it, Mister Stark. I’ve been wandering for forever looking for someone - anyone - but so far it’s just been strangers. Everyone here has been ripping each other apart to survive, but I knew if I just kept going you’d find me eventually, and - and you did!”

Tony’s eyes fill with tears that threaten to spill over. Peter’s right, they did it - _he found his kid_. He leans his head down and inhales the scent of Peter’s curls.

 _One last time. Once more and never again_.

Peter says something into his collarbone, but Tony is too busy taking in this moment to listen to the muffled sounds. 

_I’m holding my kid. I’m holding Peter._

After a few seconds, Peter pulls away just enough to look up at him, red-rimmed eyes contrasting deeply with his relieved smile. “Mister Stark, did you hear me?”

Tony can only barely shake his head. He doesn’t want what comes next. He doesn’t want _anything_ to come next. He wants to stay here, just like this, forever.

He feels a hard yank deep inside himself, but he ignores it to focus on his kid. "What was that, Pete?"

“How do we get home?”

 

BEFORE

“How the hell am I the key to fixing this? Thanos gutted me like a fish. If I couldn’t defeat him before, I certainly can’t now,” Tony argues. 

_I’m useless. I only get people killed. Don’t make me the center of this._

“Strange told you he saw over 14 million possible outcomes, did he not? And only one in which we win?” Wong asks, to which Tony nods against his better judgement. “And yet he saved you, Stark, even after he said he would not, am I correct?”

“Yes, but -”

“Strange sacrificed the Time Stone because he knew you to be the catalyst for the one possible outcome in which we triumph.”

Tony shakes his head. “And how exactly do you know this?”

“Before giving up the Eye of Agamotto to Thanos, Strange was able to use the gem to connect with me on the psychic plane. He shared what the stone revealed to him, which is what is required for us to bring back those who were taken by Thanos.”

“So, what do you need from me then? Do I need to sacrifice myself?” Tony asks hysterically, raising his arms. “Fine, take me. I’ll gladly die if it brings him back. I’ll do anything you need me to do, if it it means he's alive again.”

Wong pauses then, which leaves an opening for Steve’s lingering question. “Who are you talking about, Tony?”

 

NOW 

“I have a plan, Underoos. But we have some time to kill first, okay?”

Peter nods, looking at Tony with so much trust and admiration it burns something deep in his chest with equal amounts love and self-hatred. He brings the kid in for another hug, one Peter returns even tighter. “I really missed you, Mister Stark. Thank you for coming back for us.”

_You can’t turn back now._

“Kid, I know this is going to sound crazy, but can you do me a favor?”

“‘Course.”

“Face the lake for me.”

Peter looks up at him with a confused expression, but does as asked. “O-o-okay,” he manages to say between skeptical giggles, turning. “Facing the lake now.”

Tony feels another pull from deep within. The stone is calling him away. _Just a little more time._

Tony puts his hands on Peter’s shoulders. “Now, uh, tell me about your favorite day? Like, if you could pick one day in your life that was absolutely the best you can remember, what day would it be?”

The kid tenses a bit, and Tony worries his time is up.

_Not yet, please not yet. I’m not ready._

 

BEFORE

Tony lowers his arms, looking down at the ground for a few moments before raising sorrowful eyes to Steve. “ _Peter_ ,” he whispers, his voice catching on the name. He glances over to Rhodey then, whose eyes are heavy with unshed tears for his friend. “I’m talking about Spider-Man. Underoos. A kid who I loved more than maybe even Pepper. _My kid_.”

Before he can get too lost in his memories, Tony turns back to Wong. “So, what do I need to do? Just tell me and I’ll do it.”

After a beat Wong continues, voice solemn. “The Soul Stone required of Thanos the direct sacrifice of the being whom he loved most: his daughter, Gamora. Even if we were to retrieve the gauntlet intact from the Titan, the gem will not yield the souls it holds without an equal, if not greater, sacrifice.”

Tony feels his entire being turn to ice, as though he’s been dropped into a frozen hell. _No. No._

_“No.”_

“Stark, your love for the child is in fact what will save trillions of others.” Wong pauses again, clearly unsure how to proceed. “However, it will require the largest sacrifice a father can make. One no father should have to make, but one you, and _only_ you, must. For the sake of the universe, you will have to give up your son to the soul stone.”

The room fills with small gasps as everyone looks immediately to Tony, but a haze has gone over his mind. “Nonono. No, I - I can’t. I won’t - I can’t -”

Tony’s body involuntary shudders, as though struck by lightning. “Just - all of you, just leave me the fuck _alone_.” 

With that he storms out of the room, silence reigning in his wake.

NOW

Peter relaxes as his mind recalls a particularly good day not all that long ago. 

“Um… uh, I guess maybe two Saturdays before the donut ship arrived? When Ned and May came with me to the compound for the day. We watched ‘Big Hero 6’ and ate pizza with you and Pepper, remember? And then Ned was telling that story about the time he dared me to put a spaghetti noodle up my nose and pretend to sneeze in class, and he got so animated that he accidentally spilled a bunch of marinara sauce all over Pepper’s shirt?”

Tony cards his fingers through Peter’s hair, even chuckling when the kid mentions the noodle story. “Yeah, Pepper didn’t want me to tell you but she had to toss that blouse. Turns out marinara isn’t easy to get out of white satin.”

“Ah nooo, really, Mister Stark? Remind me to apologize to her when we get home.”

It’s Tony who tenses then, his hands stilling in Peter’s curls. Peter must notice because he turns a bit toward Tony, leaning into him. “Anyway, it wasn’t exactly the most special day or anything, but I was with everyone I loved and who loved me, y’know?”

Tony leans down to kiss the crown of his head. Silently, he changes the suit’s mode to manual Instant Kill, and gently places his hands on Peter’s neck.

 

BEFORE 

Wong stays for hours after Tony flees the room, pursued quickly by Rhodes, who returns minutes later shaking his head. From Nebula they learn Thanos is likely back on Titan, and will have used the gauntlet to repopulate his home planet with just enough of his people to amass another army. They conference with Rocket and the Wakandans about tech options and space travel limitations, and slowly but surely a plan begins to form.

 

NOW

“I know what you mean. You couldn’t have picked a more perfect day, Pete. I’m so proud of you.”

He squeezes Peter's neck, gently, just for emphasis. Peter's whole body stills, glancing around. “Mister Stark, we need to go, something bad is about to happen-”

_Not yet. Not yet. I need more time._

“I love you so very much, Peter.”

Peter tenses up fully then, recognizing where the threat is coming from now. He doesn’t try to get out of Tony’s grasp on his neck, like Tony thought he would. Instead Tony feels the kid try to force himself to relax, though he doesn’t miss how his breaths begin to hitch. “We, uh - we’re not going home, are we?”

 

BEFORE

After everyone has said farewell for the evening, Steve goes down to the workshop, where he is surprised to find the door ajar. “Tony?” he called, but there's no answer.

He walks a few feet in, and almost immediately steps on glass. “FRIDAY, lights,” he demands, and the room is instantly bright. In the center of the workshop is Tony, knees pulled to his chest, head down. He doesn’t move when Steve call his name again, or when he softly sits down beside him on the floor. His arms are wrapped around his legs, and gently held in his hands is what appears to be a photo. 

_Underoos & me Dec. 2017_ is written across the back in Tony’s scrawl.

Steve carefully grabs a corner, but doesn’t pull. “Is that…?”

Tony lets go, and Steve takes the photo and turns it around. It’s clearly a candid shot. The kid - _Peter_ \- is looking straight into the camera, his face alight with a giant smile, perhaps mid-laugh. Tony, though, is not looking at the camera but instead at the teen, his face one of pure fondness and protection. 

_Just like a father looks at a son_ , Steve thinks.

 

NOW

Tony forces himself to hold back the sob threatening to erupt from his throat. 

Another tug, this time stronger. _Only moments left now._

“No kid, I’m sorry, we’re not going home this time. But don’t worry, I'm not leaving you. Not ever again.”

Peter’s breaths ratchet up then, and Tony knows he’s about ten seconds away from a full blown panic attack. He still doesn’t try to run though. “Wi-will it hurt?”

 _God, I love you so much, Peter, you brave, brave kid_. “No, Pete, not even a little. I’ll make sure of it.”

_Now._

“O-okay, okay then. I, uh, I’m ready. I just want you to know, M-Mister Stark, that I love you too, I love you so much, just like if you were my d-da-”

_NOW._

Tony twists his arms - there's a final _snap_ \- and it’s over.

 

BEFORE

“Listen, Tony,” Steve begins, carefully setting the photo down on the desk beside them, “If it was up to me, it would literally be anyone but you who had to do this. Hell, I would give up Buck in a heartbeat if it meant you could have Peter back, safe and sound.”

Tony doesn’t say a word, but his back hitches, and Steve can tell he’s trying hard not to lose it again.

“But, maybe that’s why it has to be you and Peter, y’know? The universe doesn’t give anything worth fighting for up without an actual fight, and usually it takes a far larger toll than it took to lose it in the first place. Maybe the fact that any one of us would trade places with you if we could, is why it has to be you.”

Tony raises his head then, and the expression of utter defeat on his face as he turns to Steve is one the soldier knows instantly he will never forget, not in a hundred lifetimes. “There was never really a choice. Death and despair was always how it was going to end for me, and I accepted that a long time ago. Just... why the kid? He's so _good_ and he always fights for what's right and he never gives up and-”

Tony’s breath hitches again just then, but he wipes away the last tear on his cheek, as though steeling himself for what is coming next. 

“I’m going to need one last favor, Cap.”

 

NOW

Drax appears first on Titan, and James hears Rocket let out a whoop. The alien is followed quickly by Mantis and then Quill, none of whom appear worse for the wear, if very confused. Strange, of course, looks not the least perturbed upon his return.

James is only just barely aware of all this, however, because as soon as the Guardians begin to appear, he shouts, “Cap, take the gauntlet off Tony! Get him out of there!”

Steve, however, doesn’t move. Instead he stares down at Tones, who is on the ground unmoving, his eyes ablaze, with something like pity. Then, before James can stop him, he raises his shield and begins slamming it as hard as he can into Tony’s chest.

James lets out a primal scream he didn’t know he was capable of, and lunges for the soldier. However, Thor holds him back, and Nat stands in front of him, hands on his face. “It’s okay. Tony asked Steve to do this. It’s what he wanted.”

“No,” he barks in her face, but Nat just holds on all the tighter.

“Think what he gave up for us, Rhodes. For everyone. It’s the least we can do to grant him peace with the kid.”

James collapses then, his whole body folding in on itself as he breaks down in sobs. However, his cries don’t overpower the sounds of Steve’s shield first hitting metal and then cracking bones. 

"It's a good death," Thor says quietly. "A hero's death." 

Somehow the silence after is worse.

 

BEFORE

For Tony, the time between his decision to sacrifice Peter and the final voyage to Titan moves agonizingly slowly. He does his best to be in the present, to help with the preparations, but in his own time finds he can do little but stare into the middle distance of wherever he finds himself, recalling with mesmerizing detail the best memories he has of everyone else he’s lost only to feel excruciating pain when each clip in his head fades out.

_All I ask is that we’re together when it’s all over._

Before they board the ship for Titan, he goes in search of Steve, finding him in his room in Wakanda, preparing his battle gear.

“Cap, I need you to hang on to some things for me,” he says without preamble, holding out an envelope which Steve gently takes from his hands. 

“What’s in it, Tony?”

“There’s a letter for May Parker in there. Make sure she gets it, will you?” Tony asks. “And, uh, I want you to hang onto this for me too,” he adds, holding out a folded photograph.

Steve recognizes it immediately upon seeing the scrawled _Underoos &_ before the rest disappears around the crease.

“Are you sure Rhodes wouldn’t want this, Tony? Or May?” he asks. 

Tony face scrunches. “Nah, I want you to have it. Put it, I don’t know, in some old scrapbook maybe. Or wherever you want, it won’t matter to me soon enough.”

Steve takes the photograph, unfolds it, and stares into the kid’s grinning face. With their plans so close at hand, and the chances of victory still so very fragile, it feels like Peter Parker is reaching from the very depths of the stone into Steve’s own soul. “He really was a good kid, Tony.”

“He was the best of all of us,” Tony replies quietly, turning away.

"He was loved by the best, too." 

Tony stops, takes a breath, then keeps walking. “See you on the ship, Cap.”

 

NOW

Tony feels it the instant his body dies on Titan. He cradles Peter in his lap, stroking his cheek and rocking slowly as the suit stands nearby, when suddenly the strong pull he was feeling in his gut - the pull to return home that he’d been ignoring with everything he has - goes out like a candle in the breeze.

_Thank you, Cap, for giving me this._

Gently, so very gently, he lays Peter down on the ground, kissing his temple one last time before he stands tall, facing his last and greatest creation.

“Initiate Instant Kill.”

The suit’s arms raise, and the repulsors light up. 

Tony closes his eyes.

_I’m coming, kid._


End file.
